Dani Rhea
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I have been blessed with the opportunity to write for the Wise County Messenger, as a columnist, for the past nine years. My hometown newspaper took a chance on me based on a few letters to the editor and blog posts, and it has been one of my most favorite experiences. I write about family life, teacher life, married life, friend life, my life--I actually have creative freedom to write about anything. Because of this opportunity, I have nine years worth of articles stored in my files. NINE YEARS. My kids were so wittle back then! Now I'm facing the teenage and college years, and my experience is so different. But, I know what has made my voice stand out is the commonality I have with all moms, parents, grandparents, and everyone else in my shoes. We all just want to know we are doing a good job, right? Go ahead, read on. Leave a comment and let me know that I'm on the right track, or give me advice to get me on the right track. I'm open to you. Our words, our stories, are what connect us--they are what defines our human experience. Together. 

"Thank you so much for your columns. You are so talented and they add a lot to the paper and community." -Richard Green, Editor for the Wise County Messenger

Yellowstone, Summer 2015

The first trips my husband and I took together were camping trips. We both loved going off grid for a few days, and honestly, camping was easy on our college-student budget. We became regulars at the state parks around College Station, and experts at tenting, campfire-building, and stargazing. Camping became “our thing,” and after graduation we packed the tent and bag phone (remember those??) in my Taurus to live out the lyrics to Robert Earl Keene’s “Gringo Honeymoon.” We spent the next five weeks National Park hopping through seventeen states, talking about our future jobs, future kids, and future camping trips with those kids, paid for because of those jobs. We dreamed of becoming full timers, and pulling a camper with a shower and potty into our nightly campsite. Those 9,000 plus miles helped shape a part of Us, and this summer we shared some of that history with our three kids as we lived out the lyrics to a different song in our very own camper at Yellowstone National Park.

We planned for ten days, and a lot of togetherness.  A lot. I must admit, I was nervous about how much togetherness the children could take, especially all cozy in the backseat of the truck, and at all the historical landmarks we planned to view. I was especially wary of how much they would appreciate the natural landscape—our only major attraction for about 4,000 miles. But, it worked, and it was during all this togetherness and solitude from the real world that we made some interesting observations.

1-Our family is absolutely addicted to Google. As soon as we entered Wyoming, our phones boasted “no service,” and there was no texting, emailing, spotifying—nothing. On one hand it was AWESOME. The teenager couldn’t plug in, and the husband couldn’t check email. We were TOGETHER. But on the other hand, we realized that none of us really knows the answer to anything, and we wonder about a lot of random things. I lost count of how many times a day we wished we could Google something, and eventually we had to start writing down our questions for future Googling when our cell service returned.

2-We LOVE a gas station break. I’m serious. We are critical of the gas stations we choose, and particularly love a gas station/gift shop combination. We practically run out of the car to peruse the options of refreshing beverages and treats, and with those in hand, wander aimlessly up and down every isle shopping for treasures. They might not seem like treasures to everyone, but they are treasures nonetheless.

3-State signs are a hard stop to make with five family members for proper Kodak moments. My husband and I used to be able to hop out in five seconds, smile and move on. Now it’s a fifteen minute stop in order to stalk the road for a safe pull out while the children gather shoes and untangle themselves from the back seat. It’s worth it—well, I think it’s worth it. It’s just a process, as with many things.

4-We love our dogs. About three days into the trip we wanted to FaceTime the dogs to let them know we hadn’t forgotten them, and at every mountain, hike, campsite, or dinner we couldn’t help but wonder what the dogs would think. I’m not sure how many people think for their dogs, but we do more often than I realized. 

5-We cannot play family Putt-Putt. Without going into too many dysfunctional family details, let’s just say it’s forever off limits, and professional golfing, miniature or otherwise is not in anyone’s future. Ever.

6-Yellowstone is beautiful. There actually aren’t words to describe the uniqueness of this little corner of the world. We were amazed by the geology, the geysers, and the steam vents (just to name a few!). We drove inside of a volcano. We hiked a mountain. We watched boiling water erupt from underground, and steam float through acres of grassland and mountain terrain. We saw hundreds of bison, were surprised by their angry sounds, and quickly got out of their way. We saw a bear and a bald eagle. It took my breath away, and I watched it inspire my children. It changed all of us—for the better.

7-It’s always good to have a plan, and a plan for that plan. It’s important to have a big plan for the whole trip, little plans for each part of the trip, and tiny plans for each day within the trip. It’s also important to have back up plans. Our children don’t do well changing plans or making plans in the moment. They like a map, a destination, and a set of tasks. We had one day without a plan. One day. Never again.

8-Motorcycles are really, really loud. We managed to plan our trip during the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally when a documented one million bikes were on the road. That’s a lot of motorcycles for a family of five to maneuver through on the highways, gas stations, campsites, and Mt. Rushmore—especially Mount Rushmore. I had no idea bikers were so patriotic, but according the parking garage and motorcycle parade we experienced, they love the Black Hills of South Dakota. 

9-Every state looks different, and our country is enormous. I printed a map for the kids to reference as we road tripped up to Yellowstone, across to Mt. Rushmore, and home again. We colored the states we traveled through on this vacation, as well as other states we have visited in previous vacations. There was some interesting conversation as the kids compared Texas to other states in size, people, customs, and seasons.  We also decided every state other than Texas is cold all the time. We bought sweaters.

10-Family vacations are precious. Traveling itself is important to us, and I think we’ve managed to pass that on to our children. Of course we love and crave new experiences, different cultures, and breathtaking sights, but for our family, it really is more than just the destination, and that’s why we absolutely love the Road Trip. Carving out the time to be together, just the five of us, without the distraction of our everyday is sacred. It’s not always sunshine and roses, as referenced in the Putt-Putt discussion, but it is always real, and I love when things are real. As I look into the next ten years, I feel how precious these moments are, and want to create more precious memories that could make a difference in the family we become.

It was my daughter that pointed out that we had made it. On our first day on the trip, I was rambling on and on about how wonderful it was to have a refrigerator traveling with us in the camper for our drinks, lunches, and snacks, and as she was making fun of my simplistic happiness, it was actually she who said the words, “You and Daddy did it Mom, just like you hoped for in the scrapbook of your Gringo Honeymoon. ” Of course her realization made me tear up, because that’s what I do, but I was overwhelmed at her simple truth. We did make it, and I hadn’t even realized it. We’ve stood on mountaintops. We’ve white-water rafted. We’ve seen Old Faithful. We’ve cooked family dinners over a campfire, and lived in a camper for ten days without going insane. This time the music was more of a soundtrack than a guideline as we fought over Taylor Swift, Pitch Perfect, Texas Country, and Imagine Dragons, but her simple observation proved just how much our experiences mold us and how our blessings humble us. I don’t think our kids really ever thought about life before them, but this trip showed them a time when my husband and I were just Us, with only a promise of them. I think they were a little surprised by that, and that tiny bit of perspective makes me smile.